The Art of Wintering: Embracing Rest & Renewal this Winter

So many of us dread the cold, dark, winter months. But what if winter is full of hidden treasures? What if our mindset is often the greatest barrier?

Today, I’m going to delve into the subject of wintering. As we get closer and closer to winter solstice, the shortest and darkest day of the year, I thought it would be helpful to explore a little about the gifts hidden in this frigid season and how we might notice the support available to us in this season rather than simply seeing it as depressing and depleting. 

I’ll start with an example: it’s probably no surprise the research confirms that people tend to sleep longer during winter months. But, did you know that people tend to have more REM sleep in winter months, which is the part of rest that is most associated with dreaming? What if we saw winter as a time of turning inward and the darkness as a resource for dreaming, allowing a visionary space to take hold. When the longer days of sunlight and warmth return and we move more outward again, the winter will have replenished our rest, our vision, and perhaps our readiness for a different way of being.¹

If you saw winter as moving into our restful, dreamy, visionary season, what do you think would shift for you as you move into this season? I’d love to hear your thoughts – feel free to email me ([email protected]) or DM me @thecalmingground on Facebook and Instagram and let me know what comes up for you! I read all my messages and will respond to you! 

In my psychotherapy practice, many people come to me to for support with navigating something called Seasonal Affective Disorder. This disorder causes lethargy and low mood and, at times, feelings of hopelessness. This has been assumed to have a purely biological basis because our mood-regulation neurotransmitter levels, like serotonin, tend to be lower during the winter months than in summer months. Often anti-depressants, vitamin D, and special lights are suggested for people who struggle with a lower mood and low energy during the winter months. 

Health psychologist Kari Leibowitz conducted fascinating research on winter and wellbeing. She traveled 200 miles north of the Artic Circle, to a city that does not have any direct sunlight from mid-November to mid-January. The most they get during their dark period is 2-3 hours of indirect sunlight, which shines from below the horizon. What’s incredible about this region is that the population’s wellbeing isn’t significantly impacted by their polar night in winter.  How could that be?! 

This is where we come to the power of mindset in our wellbeing. 

Did you know that people who are able to view stressful times in life as challenges that provide a possibility to learn and adapt cope better than those who are more fear-focused, who maybe focus on the possibility of failure, something going wrong, or something bad happening. These different ways of approaching the same situation can not only alter someone’s mood but also their bodies – their blood pressure, their heart rate and stress levels, and how long it takes them to ultimately recover.²

Ok, so let’s come back to winter. What does mindset have to do with it? 

So, we may have a mindset that winter is dreadful, cold, dark, gloomy, boring, and depressing. What’s incredible is that, as I say those words to myself, I’m already noticing the heaviness of it. The long, dreary winter. 

Now, let’s try another frame. We may have a mindset that winter is cozy, magical, restorative, restful, and rich with possibilities. 

Some research even suggests that darkness can be nurturing to creativity. 

Does that feel better to you? It definitely does to me. I imagine a cup of hot tea or cocoa, curled up in a blanket with a good book and a fire or candlelight and the darkness and cold of winter outside my window, offering me a beautiful contrast to my cocoon. 

Now, I don’t want to pretend that this is all rainbows. I’ve certainly been one of those people who have slipped on the ice and actually hit my head pretty hard and got a concussion. I’m not about to say that that’s a bright side of winter. I’ve had people I’ve known get into frightening car accidents due to black ice in winter. There’s extra caution needed when the weather gets precarious with snow and ice. And losing your access to electricity and warmth in the cold is no joke.  

I want to talk about what is within our control, though. How can we experience this season in a way that nourishes and replenishes us rather than sucks the energy out of us? 

Steps We Can Take to Shift Our Winter Mindset

To quote Kari Leibowitz, “Do something that you can look forward to that takes advantage of the darkness and turns it into an asset.” ³

As I’ve said so many times before on this podcast, small steps, when practiced consistently, make a HUGE difference. So, let’s think sustainable, small, microshifts that can make a big difference over time. 

Here are some examples: 

1. Remind yourself that winter is a natural and biological time for rest. If you can, offer yourself more catnaps, or even just set an alarm on your phone at your desk for one minute, close your eyes and take deep breaths as a form of rest until your alarm alerts you that your restful minute is complete. 
2. If you like candlelight or led light candles, use them! Create a cozy atmosphere in your space by allowing the darkness to accentuate your calm by candlelight (right now, as I write this episode, it’s 5pm and the sun is nearly set. I have a candle burning at my desk. It’s such a simple thing that makes such a big difference. Give it a try!
3. Ask yourself what activities you can do that will support and uplift winter for you? This might involve eating comforting warm foods like soups, baking, writing in a journal or reading a good book. I love knitting, so for me winter is a wonderful time to get out my knitting needles and feel the warmth of the wool as I knit. It’s too hot in the summer to enjoy it in the same way for me. 
4. Another one that might be hard, but it can make a big difference to calm your nervous system, is to take a walk outside in the winter. Again, as long as it’s not precariously cold and icy out there, getting outdoors in the wintertime can be refreshing and winter nature has a particular beauty. Have you ever watched a sunset against the silhouettes of winter bare trees? Or seen a frozen waterfall? 
5. You might also try cross country or downhill skiing or other winter sports. There’s a lot of fun to be had out there, if you’re up for a little winter adventure! 

Countries like Denmark have a concept called Hygge. Hygge word is used to describe the Scandinavian concept of coziness that stems from enjoying life’s simple pleasures. This is all about finding simple, low-cost ways to offer yourself comfort and coziness in your space and in your everyday life. This is a mindful invitation to slow down, rest and restore. 

 Examples of ways to practice Hygge: 

1. Creating a space with warm lightening. Think candlelight, soft lights – anything that doesn’t glare and offers you a sense of hearth. 
2. Perhaps get an indoor plant or too or even pictures of nature that can bring a sense of earthy coziness and aliveness into your space. 
3. Maybe designate a space in your home that is specifically for your comfort. This could include particularly soft pillows or blankets, maybe a candle. This is your nook or space to go to experience comfort, reset, nurture yourself, and experience your wintering restoration. 
4. Listen to calming music that you find particularly soothing. 
5. Engage in something simple and kind to you. This could be enjoying a cup of tea, taking a nice hot bath, putting on your favorite slippers and watching a movie you particularly love or have been waiting to watch.

Denmark is considered to be one of the world’s happiest countries. This could be in large part to their philosophy and concept of hygge. The Danes tend to be exceptionally good at decoupling wealth and well-being because they focus on the small things that really matter, including spending more quality time with friends and family and relishing the good in life.⁴

So, my dear listeners, what might you offer yourself this winter as the skies darken early and the colder air sets in. What magic might be there within you to be nourished right now if you turn your energy inward? For those who are caregivers of small children or elders, or those who aren’t able to care for themselves. For those of you who work many shifts at a job and don’t feel the freedom or space in your life to winter right now. Remember, it can be as small as a minute of breathing with your eyes closed, or lighting a candle in the bathroom as you take your shower. This doesn’t have to be time consuming or elaborate. It’s for you in ways that make sense for you in your life. 

I’ll end this with a quote from Katherin May’s book Wintering: The Power of Rest and Retreat in Difficult Times: 

“I recognized winter. I saw it coming (a mile off, since you ask), and I looked it in the eye. I greeted it and let it in. I had some tricks up my sleeve, you see. I've learned them the hard way. When I started feeling the drag of winter, I began to treat myself like a favored child: with kindness and love. I assumed my needs were reasonable and that my feelings were signals of something important. I kept myself well fed and made sure I was getting enough sleep. I took myself for walks in the fresh air and spent time doing things that soothed me. I asked myself: What is this winter all about? I asked myself: What change is coming?”⁵

Until next time, my friends. Wishing you well.

References:

¹ "Winter Health: How to Cope with Seasonal Depression." The Independent, 6 Dec. 2024, https://www.independent.co.uk/health-and-fitness/winter-health-seasonal-depression-light-b2646316.html.

² Walton, Alice G. “Dreading a Dark Winter Lockdown? Think Like a Norwegian.” The Guardian, 26 Sept. 2020, https://www.theguardian.com/science/2020/sep/26/dreading-a-dark-winter-lockdown-think-like-a-norwegian.

³ Warner, Kelsey. “What Is Hygge? 13 Ways to Practice This Danish Lifestyle Trend at Home.” SELF, 2 Dec. 2020, https://www.self.com/story/practicing-hygge-danish-lifestyle.

⁴ Warner, Kelsey. “What Is Hygge? 13 Ways to Practice This Danish Lifestyle Trend at Home.” SELF, 2 Dec. 2020, https://www.self.com/story/practicing-hygge-danish-lifestyle.

⁵ May, Katherine. Wintering: The Power of Rest and Retreat in Difficult Times. Riverhead Books, 2020.